Deb Owen
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5.11.2010 | Crisis Times: What To Do (and What Not To Do)
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Deb Owen debunks some time-honored myths ("Just Think Positive Thoughts!") and gets real about getting through tough times.
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4.14.2010 | Letter To My Younger Self
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Work Her Way Expert Deb Owen has some wisdom to share with a younger version of herself.
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1.19.2010 | Where Do You Want To Be In The End Of January?
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Where do you want to be at the end of the month? It will be here before you know it. And if you have any friends who have made similar goals, how are you going to feel watching them as they move forward and you’re still thinking it through or trying to find the motivation [...]
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11.28.2009 | What Bill Belichick Can Teach Us About Decision-Making
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Who is Bill Belichick? (It's OK, non-sports fans.) He's the coach of the New England Patriots. (You're welcome.) Decision-making doesn't just come down to stats, in football, in business, or in life
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11.18.2009 | Looking For A Job? Do This To Set Yourself Apart
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They say unemployment is at 10.2%. That's bad enough, until you consider that the true number, especially when including the under-employed numbers, is potentially much higher. So maybe you're one of the unemployed or a recent graduate out there looking for a job. And maybe you're feeling the frustration because you're getting so few bites. Read on for a great way to color outside of the lines and distinguish yourself from the pack.
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DEB OWEN'S COMMENT FEED
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Posted on 5.2.2010 2:34pm
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I love that perspective from your creative director. And he's right. It turns out that there is an all-important developmental window that occurs between the ages of 9-12.
It's a crucial time for young girls and can have major factors in determining self-esteem and their future choices, but it's not a very long span of time to reach them. It can be done though.
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Posted on 5.2.2010 2:28pm
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Thanks Brenda! And welcome to Work Her Way!
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Posted on 10.22.2009 4:26pm
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Great tips on dealing with a bully boss, Peggy.
I'd expand on seeking the assistance of HR, given my own background. Bully bosses are often tolerated for a reason by those at the top. (Usually, it has to do with achieving certain results valued by the higher-ups.) Often, HR is aware of the bully bosses behavior.
If possible, learn as much as you can about the policies and the procedures used by HR if a complaint is raised. (Believe it or not, I have seen situations where a C-level HR person would address this type of issue by naming the person who brought the complaint when addressing the issue with the bully boss, thereby exacerbating retaliatory behavior.)
When you visit HR, have information at the ready. Document dates, times, meetings, others present, and the offending behavior. If other coworkers are raising similar complaints and you can approach HR together without seeming that you've 'rallied the troops', do that as well. (And yes. Leave the psycho babble at home.)
Given the time that going through a disciplinary process can take even when HR does handle the issue appropriately, it could be a while before any true change is seen.
So the exit strategy? I completely agree. Be prepared to accept that you're responsible for your well-being and your future career -- and move on if necessary.
Great advice, Peggy. I look forward to reading more from you.
All the best!
deb
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Posted on 10.21.2009 5:54pm
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Oh yes. I used to be an arm-crosser. Not for any other reason than it was a comfortable posture for me. Generally, I would be intently focused on what the other person was saying when I took this stance. When I became aware that it came across as defensive, I stopped.
I believe that we bring what we want to see to situations. If you want others to be comfortable, relax and be comfortable yourself. It may be business, but when we interact with others, it's just like inviting someone into your home. (We're just inviting people into 'our space' when we're out.)
All the best!
deb
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Posted on 10.20.2009 6:49pm
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Cathie,
I speak to so many women still trying to 'have it all', and struggling with it. They will ask me how I do everything I do. (I remind them I don't have children, and I'm pretty sure my dog doesn't count.)
The message needs to be out there that there are times in our lives that we focus on different things. Our priorities shift and change throughout our lives. We might 'have it all' over the long-term, but not all at once.
I appreciate women at the forefront such as yourself setting the record straight about how it really works and that it's about being happy, whatever choices we make.
All the best!
deb
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Posted on 10.20.2009 6:28pm
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Thank you both for the comments.
Those types of behaviors can also get you kicked off the playground, and lose the respect of peers and others in the workplace.
Viviana, I agree. I see less victimization and also a willingness of women to go create what it is they're seeking rather than continuing to try to get it from places where it just wasn't happening. (Such as going out and creating a business.)
Thanks for the compliment on the avoiding victim mentality articles. Personal responsibility is something I believe in strongly. It is amazing working with people and seeing the 'lightbulb' go off when they realize areas that this type of thinking might be occurring. And then seeing that they have choices.
All the best!
deb
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